My son and I were talking yesterday and I watched him finally confront the sadness that he had kept at bay for the last couple of weeks. He was sad he wasn’t going back to school for the foreseeable future, that he wouldn’t get to enjoy days with his great teacher and friends. And he asked me how long the sickness was going to last. And I don’t know. So, we talked about how we do hard things, and find the joy in them. And we talked about how it’s okay to be sad and miss things, and then also okay to enjoy the day in the way we could.
The reactions from many of the people I work with in counseling have been similar—how do we do this season when everything has been uprooted and made raw?
I was thinking through practical tools I’ve been giving people, which I will talk about later in this post. But first, God reminded me this morning we do this season of life just like we do every other season--in dependence on Jesus. Every morning we can wake up knowing that the day is too big for us, and ask Him to be all we need for it. That hasn’t changed with the magnitude of the situation, or the radical difference many of us feel in our lives. God hasn’t changed. He is still more than enough for all the pieces of our lives, even the ones that look like pandemic, shelter-at-home and remote everything.
So, while we are abiding in Christ each day, I have put together some practical things to help during this time:
1. Routine. Set up a routine at home, even if you are not working from there. I think our tendency is to waste time on social media, zone out on TV or obsess on the news. Set up times that you can be on social media or on TV, but not indiscriminately. Include other activities in your day—walking, working out, cleaning, cooking, doing something creative, reading, etc. If you have it set up so that you know what’s next in your schedule (even if that’s a pretty loose one), you won’t lose as much time in a way that makes you feel unproductive.
2. Reach out. The people struggling the most right now it seems are the feelers who thrive on personal connection. If you feel as though you are dragging because you don’t have the energy that comes from interaction with others, make time each day to reach out to others in a way you can. Video chat, text, email or wave at the neighbors. I see so many organizing group Facetimes, prayer nights on Zoom and church streaming. I know it’s not the same, but it’s something! You might even connect in a way you haven’t before because you are getting creative about making it happen.
3. Help someone else. This kind of goes along with reaching out, but there are so many people who need help in some way right now. We might only see limitations in terms of shelter-at-home orders or social distancing requirements, but there are so many ways you can help. Ask someone if they need groceries and include them in your grocery order for pickup. Text a friend you know is at home alone and is struggling. Keep encouraging the healthcare workers who are stretched to the max right now. Make a silly video to cheer people up. Be creative, and be helpful.
4. Reevaluate and reflect. Look at your life when everything is on pause and see what things you’d like to change. Recognize that times of quiet can be incredibly valuable as God can speak to us and we actually hear Him, rather than crowding out His voice with busyness and chaos. If you aren’t in a place you’d like to be right now, think through what you’d like to do differently going forward. Enjoy the family time (even when the kids are fighting) and the change of having no plans for the day. Look at how the good can be implemented in your future, and how you’d like to make time for the things you miss.
5. Draw near. Over and over, throughout the day, I must turn from fear and leave it quietly with Jesus. We don’t know how to do pandemic. We’ve never done it before. But Jesus is the same. He is walking with us throughout, and wants this time to be a catalyst for your deepened relationship with Him. When you are tempted to walk in fear and anxiety, turn to Him and lay it all down at His feet. He cares for you—He is your Shepherd. Let Him shepherd you in His love, and draw near to find comfort.
My old identity has been co-crucified with Messiah and no longer lives; for the nails of his cross crucified me with him. And now the essence of this new life is no longer mine, for the Anointed One lives his life through me—we live in union as one! My new life is empowered by the faith of the Son of God who loves me so much that he gave himself for me, and dispenses his life into mine! Galatians 2:20