I watched a show the other day in which a character was having a crisis of faith. All the things she believed about God came crashing down around her as she battled through an emotional trauma which started the whole thing. The questions sometimes seem to rise up with enough force to crush us. I talk to people often who are dealing with the same thing—questions, doubt, discontent with what God is doing or not doing. So what do you do when you aren’t sure what to believe? What do you do when you aren’t sure that God is there?
Go back to your history with Jesus. What drew you to Him in the first place? What places did you see His hand and His love for you? In what times has He met you? Don’t forget to remember. We are tempted to claim it was imagination, but you know it wasn’t. He may feel far away right now, but He has felt near in the past—and feeling don’t determine the truth. Go back to those places and choose to remember.
Remember He is with you in this, not abandoning you to it. One of the best tools of the enemy (you know, the one who wants to destroy us?) is to make us believe that God is disconnected and uncaring. If we believe that we suffer without any purpose or any connection with our Father, we end up hating Him. But over and over again God proves Himself involved, vulnerable to pain as we reject Him, and so crazy in love with us that He keeps coming even when we hate Him. Come back to the truth of His Love for you, of His connection and compassion in suffering, and of His grace to be within you.
Recognize that the “spiritual giants” of the faith did not have it all together while you struggle to keep your head above water. Many of these people questioned and criticized the way God worked in their lives, asking for a different way or a way that made sense to them. You think that Sarah was excited to wait until she was ancient to have a baby? You think that Paul wanted to be beaten, shipwrecked and locked in prison for years? You think that Esther never questioned the different ways she thought she was going to be killed by her king because of her choice to try to save her people? And David—that guy could lament and question better than anyone! The people of the Bible and the heroes of the faith who came after were imperfect people who had moments of severe doubt. They chose to hang on to God, and He was the only One who got them through.
Admit where you are and move into Him. Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief. I want to walk forward in faith, Lord, but my faith is very tiny and I need you to be everything to take a step forward. I might feel like an idiot, but I walk forward taking Him at His word—He will be the Way, the Truth and the Life. You don’t have to be super strong to do this, but instead you have to trust in His strength.
Stand on the basics like a rock. Sometimes all I have is that God is good; He loves me; and He has a plan going forward. I can’t explain a lot else, but those things I can stand firm in knowing that He has been and will be these things. Leave the questions with Him and come back to the Truth you know.
Accept the patience Jesus has for you in the time of doubt or questioning. I love Jesus’ response to Thomas after His resurrection. He offered his wounds for Thomas to touch and see, and then says that we will be even more blessed as we believe without seeing. He doesn’t call him an idiot, or condemn him for his doubt. He is patient with him. He isn’t beating up on you either, and recognizes it is hard to believe without seeing.
Be ok with not knowing every answer. My friend and mentor Mike Wells said he had finally received an answer to a question he had asked God 25 years prior. And although that can seem disheartening, for me it was encouraging. I don’t have to have all the answers now. I can wait for the time God decides I need the answer. In the meantime, I can leave my questions at His feet and wait for Him while still moving forward with Life in Him.
I read a story about Corrie Ten Boom and her father when she was a child. She was asking her father a question about something rather grown-up, and instead of answering her, he asked her to carry his big heavy briefcase on to the train. She looked at him like he was crazy, telling him she couldn’t carry the bag. He responded that some knowledge was like the heavy bag—it would be given in the time when we can handle it, not before. We can let our Father carry that knowledge until we are ready for it. Let’s trust Him with our questions and let Him carry those for us, and move forward as sheep following their Shepherd.Then, looking into Thomas’ eyes, he said, “Put your finger here in the wounds of my hands. Here—put your hand into my wounded side and see for yourself. Thomas, don’t give in to your doubts any longer, just believe!”Then the words spilled out of his heart—“You are my Lord, and you are my God!”Jesus responded, “Thomas, now that you’ve seen me, you believe. But there are those who have never seen me with their eyes but have believed in me with their hearts, and they will be blessed even more!”John 20:27-29